Here's a ministry reality check...
Men who want to go into the full-time ministry have sort of well-intentioned stupidity about them... myself included once upon a time.
We will serve the Lord without pay just for His glory and the good of the church. So when we receive pay, we are blown away to get anything for what we are doing. In many cases, it is very low pay.
But a growing family often needs more than just a little. Note the word "needs." I'm not talking about a long list of wants. Although, it's not wrong to want things.
It takes resources to run a household.
Now, I know some of you won't be able to resist getting all super-spiritual on me. Ministry is a sacrifice. Indeed. I'm all for sacrifice for the kingdom. But it's often not really the husband’s sacrifice. We are doing what we want. It's our family who is going without in key areas on account of us pursuing our desires.
This catches up with ministry marriages and ministry families.
So many pastors have wonderful wives who bear with difficult circumstances for years out of love for God and their husbands. But it takes its toll. This toll is further complicated by the wife feeling guilty for being upset about the poor circumstances as they are in them for "the service of the Lord." Similar things happen with the children.
This is why a lot of ministry households are ticking time bombs. If the bomb blows, then household you is out of order. And, depending on the severity, that could potentially be the end of the ministry for you.
The takeaway here is simple: count the cost for your household before taking a call.
Review your long-term goals and hopes with your wife. Share yours but let her talk. Let her even dream a little. Listen to her. She is your helpmate.
After coming up with a rough plan, review it with a couple of older ministry couples who have both believing children and grandchildren.
Make wise and mutual sacrifices. Finish the race well… and bring your household with you.
P.S. This isn't about churches paying their pastors. Some--even many--churches are strapped for cash. They give whatever they can. It's just not much. It's only a widow's mite. And it will do a lot of work.
This was about pastors, not churches, counting the cost. It takes two.
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When I was just getting started my new wife and I visited an elderly retired pastor and his wife in their mobile home. They were godly and happy and content. But I decided that day that I would be not only godly, happy, and content when my wife and I reached their age, but also financially solvent. I also knew that because of the fact that I was serving an inner city church at the time on a subsistence income that I would have to get creative about it. Because I did that I’ve never relied on my churches exclusively for income. And because of that I was able to serve them below “market rate.” For example, the only time one of my churches was in the red at the end of the fiscal year was 2008, when everyone was in the red. I surprised my session by taking a voluntary $20,000 pay cut in order to balance the budget. Today I serve a church that pays me well. Even so, between my wife and I we have 8 other streams of income. I’m 61 years old and it took a long time to build those income streams, but even today it’s possible to do so.
Colonizing Christians pay their pastors