Stop Overthinking It and Just Play With Your Kids
Look, what kids want most is you. Not the event. Not the production. Not the perfectly planned memory. They want your time. Even when you’re tired. Even when life feels nuts. And honestly, it doesn’t take nearly as much as we tell ourselves. Thirty or forty minutes a few times a week adds up fast.
These are some free things we’ve done over the years that our kids especially loved when they were little. I’m a Midwest guy, so that definitely shapes some of this. If you’re in a totally different part of the world, a few might miss. That’s fine. The point isn’t the list. It’s to get your brain moving a little.
Star-gazing
I’ve always loved the stars. Some of my clearest memories are just standing outside with my grandpa, staring up, barely talking. We live in the country now, so it’s easy. Walk out. Look up. But when we lived in town, I’d load the kids up and drive out to some random field on the edge of the city.
Staying up late makes it feel like an adventure. Do it enough and you’ll see shooting stars, fireballs, satellites, and eventually you’ll start recognizing stuff. I use Star Chart and Night Sky. Not because I’m smart. Because I’m not.
Rock-skipping
Find water. Any water. Pond, creek, lake, whatever. Teach them the basics. Flat rock. Sidearm. Calm spot. Then start counting. Then start competing. Then start laughing.
Simple. But it sticks.
More than once this turned into my boys knee-deep in cold water trying to flip some ridiculous boulder like they were strongmen. Whatever. That’s childhood.
Crawdad-catching
Shallow creek. Start flipping rocks. That’s it. That’s the game.
Someone will get pinched. Everyone will survive. Bring a bucket if you want to observe the prisoners. If you do this long enough, you’ll start finding salamanders, snakes, turtles. It turns into a whole thing without you trying.
Football, baseball, frisbee throwing
Yes, you need a ball. I know. Big investment.
But playing catch in the yard is basically free. Teach them to throw. Teach them to catch. If there are multiple kids, make up dumb games. Keep-away. Long toss. One-handed catches. It’s classic because it works.
Fort-building
Inside with couch cushions and blankets. Outside with sticks and limbs. Lean-tos are easy. Teepees are easy. Cardboard boxes are basically treasure.
One time I brought home some massive boxes from work. They filled the kids’ entire bedroom. That fort stayed up for days. Absolute chaos. Totally worth it.
Dump-visiting
Yep. The landfill.
Boys especially lose their minds over it. The size. The smell. The noise. Giant machines shoving mountains of trash around like it’s nothing. It hits something deep in their little caveman brains.
There’s something oddly fascinating about it. Smash stuff. Watch stuff break. Maybe rescue something that shouldn’t be there. Just go.
Leaf pile jumping
Fall shows up and parents immediately think, “Chores.”
Kids think, “Opportunity.”
Don’t just rake. Make a mountain. Let them jump in. Bury each other. Throw leaves like confetti. We used to pile them at the bottom of a hill and let the boys ride their bikes straight into it. Dumb. Loud. Perfect.
Karaoke singing
Pull up karaoke tracks on YouTube. Let everyone pick. We went through a long Greatest Showman season of life. Long.
This one skewed more toward our girls. The boys were… less committed. But that’s fine. Nobody cares how it sounds. Sing loud. Be dumb. Let your kids see you not protecting your image for once. It’s actually really good for them.
Book reading
Old faithful. This should already be happening.
Some of our favorites were Frog and Toad, Little Bear, Busytown, The Wizard of Oz, My Side of the Mountain. You don’t need an hour. A chapter or two before bed goes a long way.
Playground visiting
Swing them until your arms burn. Do the underdog. Play tag. Dare them to go down the slide backwards.
It’s not complicated. It’s presence.
Family walking
Around the block. Down a trail. Through the woods. Hold hands. Race to the mailbox. Tell stories.
Some of our best conversations happened when nobody was looking at each other.
When we were broke, and we were broke a lot, this is what we did most nights. Bikes. Tricycles. Somebody always melting down. Me usually carrying someone home. Those are some of my favorite memories. Movement does something to people. It opens them up.
Airplane watching
For a while we lived near airports. So we’d throw everyone in the van, drive to the viewing area, and just sit there.
Planes taking off. Planes landing. Over and over. Simple. Weirdly mesmerizing. Completely free.
Honestly, I think a lot of parents are overthinking this and overdoing it. There’s a place for arcades and theme parks and big splashy stuff. Sure. Go. Enjoy it. Nothing wrong with that.
But don’t miss how powerful the small things are.
Walking around the block. Skipping rocks. Catching crawdads. These are a big deal to kids. They become core memories unless you accidentally teach them not to be. If fun only “counts” when it costs money or needs tickets, they’ll learn that too.
But if you give them your time, your attention, and a little imagination, you’ll be surprised what sticks.
Ordinary moments, repeated with love and some consistency, quietly build the kind of childhood your kids will carry with them for the rest of their lives.
Indeed, one might argue that they aren't 'overthinking' they are 'underthinking'. Indeed that they are being lazy. Paying big bucks for someone else to entertain your kid is a lot easier than paying a lot fewer bucks and being forced to spend time with your kids.
And habits are important. A half an hour every day where the father reads to his kids is worth infinitely more than a half a day once a year at a theme park.