One of the greatest trials every Christian must face is the truth-over-relationship trial. You will find yourself in a situation where someone near and dear to you is at odds with the truth, refuses to be put right with it, and instead lives in open rebellion. You will then have to decide whether to risk the relationship by speaking the truth to them and asking them to walk in line with it, or to jettison any real commitment to the truth to preserve a level of peace within the relationship.
This, of course, is a battle that many parents face when a wayward child refuses to live in the light and instead rebels and runs headlong into darkness. In such a situation, the child, even when grown, will attempt to guilt the parent into submission. Perhaps they will say, “You’re choosing your religion, or you’re choosing your church, or you’re choosing the elders over your own flesh and blood. I thought you loved me.”
What you must remember at that moment is that the most loving thing you can do is to stand for the truth and not allow someone to use the relationship to beat you into submission to a lie. Great examples include Nathan speaking the truth to David, Paul speaking the truth to Peter, and Christ telling people that when it comes to ultimate allegiance, it must always be to Him, even if it means putting them at odds with their families.
One of the things I appreciate about Appalachian and Southern culture is their devotion to family. But I’ve seen that go wrong more than a few times, where the natural family is prioritized over the spiritual family in matters of truth. In that sense, the waters of baptism should always be thicker than blood. And it is one thing to be at odds with family for a short period in this life. It’s entirely another to be separated from them for all eternity. All relationships must be subordinated to our ultimate allegiance to Jesus and the truth.
A kid rebelling through sexual perversity will try to guilt their parents into supporting it. You must resist. A spouse rebelling against their God-ordained role in Scripture will attempt to guilt their other half into going along with it, maybe even under the threat of divorce. Friends will weaponize friendships against the truth. You must resist for your own soul, but also for theirs, that you may reclaim them and that they may be disciplined so that their emotions and self-centeredness do not reign over the simple facts of Scripture and reality.
Hold fast, Christian. Your God honors His faithful.
Painting: Eugène Siberdt
Our Associate Pastor says that what people want is for you to “get on the Ferris wheel with them.” To ride up and down and round and round. But what they most need is someone to stay grounded - to stand on truth - and to be right there waiting when they decide to get off.
One of my best friends, a non-practicing Catholic, tolerated my intolerance for decades. We became buddies sophomore year in high school. I became a Jesus-freak two years later. A few years later, we ran in the same circles. Our kids grew up together. He endured Bible reading. He even asked me to preach at his third wedding. I did not attend his fourth. I've heard my intolerance ruined our friendship.