One of the great blessings of my life is that I fell in love with a woman who fell in love with being a wife and mother. I love that she loves children.
Yesterday, our church started a new moms’ ministry, Eyrie. So I came over to the church just to be a presence there. Also, the folks from George Grant’s church came over to pick up an old wood pulpit that we’ve donated to them. I had to be there for that. So I waited at the door for the moving truck to arrive. I was encouraged to see all these women who chose marriage and motherhood, who love children, streaming into our new church building.
In this ministry, the women gather for breakfast, have a devotional, and then have some sort of practical workshop. Simple but effective. While they do that, we divide the children up into their own rooms. I popped my head in just to see how it was going. There were a ton of kids. As I saw all those kids, I thought, man, our church has a bright future. And children are the future of the church, but they’re also an important part of its present.
Caring for those who care for the children, building them up, encouraging them, strengthening them, is another way to invest in the spiritual well-being of children. In other words, another way of investing in the present and future of the church is investing in mothers. The blessing of both children and motherhood is under attack. And it is my hope that this ministry is a way to feed the fire of those who love this unique blessing.
With that in mind, I thought I would share Emily’s notes from the teaching she gave yesterday. I thought it was quite good...
Welcome to Eyrie
by Emily Foster
Motherhood is under attack. Our culture is a culture that despises children. Despises mothers.
I wrote that statement on a plane this weekend. I was on the first of two flights I was making, returning home from a trip to the PNW with my family. As I stared at those words in my Notes app, I questioned myself, "Is that accurate? Is that too blanket of a statement, and negatively so? Is that attitude toward children and motherhood just in the major cities and not the case across the majority of the US? Is that true of the Midwest, specifically of our own hometown of the Greater Cincinnati Area?
On the second flight, I decided to check Facebook. In a local Eastside Cincinnati "Moms and Friends" Facebook group there was a post:
“My 8 year old daughter just informed me she will never be having kids.
She said she wants to live in a small house with 1 cat. She wants an office, a room for the cat and a cat storage room.
I asked her why she didn't want kids. She said, "I am not paying for cribs, diapers, or toys. I will spend money on me and my cat."
Bahahahaha....looks like I am going to have grandkittens ya'll!"
The comments were filled with many celebratory cheers. "Heck yeah, girl!" "Sounds perfect!" "You go, girl!" "Sounds magical. Lol."
One woman replied:
"Heck yeah! I knew from a very young age that I didn't want kids, and stuck with that. I also agree with not wanting to pay for supplies! Kid stuff is expensive! I have now have two fur babies that are my whole world and are spoiled absolutely rotten. So spoiled, that I just ordered them a doggie bunk bed off of Amazon that'll arrive sometime next week."
This post had been up for about 23 hours and had already received 131 likes. Considering the normal activity of this page, it essentially had gone viral. Most posts had less than 10 likes, though I did find a few pinned posts that had 65.
In the comments, women responded with their various “animal progeny.” Collectively, there was mention of having grand-horses, grand-doggies and many, many grand-cats. One woman boasted about having a grandhamster. Amidst all the LOLs, she snuck in one honest, stinging statement: “Reggie the grandham is cute, but [I’m] still hoping for grandchildren someday.”
Tongue-in-cheek statements usually have a core truth, an underlying message that shows what the person actually believes. They are a way to reveal our true hearts about something stressful or heavy by making them lighthearted, while also having a way to backpedal and say, “It was just a joke” if not well-received.
It's jarring to hear women speak this way. Motherhood is a gift. A sacred trust. It should be a treasure that we guard, protect, revere and pass down. Not something we belittle, laugh at and mock. Sadly, it is not uncommon for women, instead of passing the torch, to snuff it out. Proverbs 14:1 says, “The wise woman builds her house, But the foolish tears it down with her own hands.”
Currently, the US Total fertility rate is 1.60 children. The replacement fertility rate required for a population to maintain its size is 2.1 children per woman. Here in Ohio, we are on par with the nation at 1.65. In the United States, 85% of the women have children vs 15% do not.
For younger women, which the CDC classifies as Prime Childbearing: Ages 20–39, delayed marriage, extended education, and economic calculations have pushed the ratio drastically toward not having children yet. In this group, approximately 48% have children vs. 52% do not.
Research from the University of New Hampshire Carsey School shows that out of 44.2 million women in this age tier, 23.1 million have never given birth. This represents a 45% increase in childlessness for this cohort since 2006.
The ratio may shift further in the future. Recent CDC Birth Expectations data reveals that nearly 40% of childless women in their 20s now state they do not expect or intend to ever have children, a sharp increase from previous decades where childlessness was almost entirely a matter of temporary delay.
In that Facebook post, one mother shared:
"My 8 year old says she isn’t [going to have any children] either because she ‘sees how much we stress you out and I don’t want that in my life.’”
Again, a nugget of truth. Motherhood is not easy. It can be very stressful. But that doesn’t mean it is bad or that we should avoid it simply because it is hard. Often it is the difficulty of a thing that makes it worthwhile. Through the challenges of motherhood, fortitude is forged. Resilience is shaped. After all, it is through pressure that transforms a lump of coal into a sparkling diamond.
So where do we turn when life is stressful? Should it be toward ourselves or toward our cats? Psalm 121:1-2 tells us where to look:
I will lift my eyes to the mountains; From where shall my help come? My help comes from the LORD, Who made heaven and earth.”
Motherhood is a refiner's fire. Its flames reveal the true nature of our souls. Its coals touch our tongues and purify our hearts. As we teach our children about the Lord and all of life, we learn about the Giver of Life and all that is important.
At Eyrie, at East River Church, it is our desire to be a supportive community to families as we raise up the next generation of Christian men & women. We started this ministry to specifically pour in to you mothers as you raise your children in the Lord.
I have had the desire to start a ministry like this since the formation of East River in 2020. About 16 years ago, I helped start and run a moms group like this for five years. I saw the good fruit that came from it and wanted to bless others through another.
There are many moms groups offered around town. It's not uncommon for them to require membership dues after attending one free meeting. I had been part of a moms group like that years ago. It was awkward to ask new moms, "Did you enjoy yourself? Want to come again? Well it will cost you!" It was also frustrating that the money collected didn’t even benefit our local chapter in any way. It all went back to corporate.
Here at East River, we want both the meetings and childcare to be completely free. We want these meetings to give moms a break while also building up and equipping them to do the hard work of mothering. But not in some generic way. Rather in a particular way. In a God-honoring way. We want to help you in practical matters such as how to improve running your households, how to care for yourself & grow in mother culture, as well as call you to raise your children in the fear & admonition of the Lord.
And we want to cultivate a supportive community of like-minded mothers. We wanted to have older mothers (and grandmothers!) reaching out to help the younger mothers. We wanted to create a place for ladies to make friends with other peers who are also currently “in the trenches” of motherhood. Sisters who you can laugh & cry with, who understand the ups and downs of a life raising children.
So what is Eyrie?
An eyrie is a nest of an eagle. The image of a bird's nest with eggs is a universal symbol of motherhood. It captures the sense of a woman's call to raise her children in the fear & admonition of the Lord and to be homeward focused to God's glory.
All women are called to be mothers. Regardless if you are a woman looking forward to motherhood, a young mom in the thick of it, a seasoned mother or a grandmother, this ministry is for YOU!
Eyrie is a place for...
Biblical instruction: Every session is grounded in scripture and the wisdom of God's word for mothers.
Practical skills: There will be hands-on, expert led teaching covering homemaking, health, hospitality, and more.
Real friendship: A safe place to be known, supported and encouraged by women in the same season as well as women a season ahead of you.
There is much available to us today through online tutorials. I've learned a lot through them. But there is something special about having someone "in the flesh" showing you the ropes. Firstly, the relationship. You don't just "feel" like you know the person. You truly do.
Second, there's a confidence you gain learning a skill side by side with an older, experienced woman vs watching her do it in a video. You gain confidence and boldness to step out and try something new when you have that seasoned lady at your elbow to ask, "Am I doing this right?"
Our time here will focus on the practical outworkings of many homemaking skills like how plan and make frugal meals, essential cooking skills, curating a beautiful home on a budget, how to maintain our bodies through standard/regular exercise as well as during the various stages of life (prenatal, postpartum, nonperi/post/menopause), planning enjoyable date nights, and much more. It will give us Titus 2 women a natural opportunity to pour into the younger women like you, and for you younger women to glean, grow & mature.
Thankfully in that FB post, there was one bold woman who posted a single, redeeming comment:
"I always said the same thing, even as a teen/college kid. Now I'm expecting my second daughter and being a mom has been the best thing ever!"
I have been a mother for 20 years and am a grandmother (my oldest and his wife are expecting the birth of their first child in March of 2027.)
It is our desire here at Eyrie, at East River, to help you with carrying the torch forward. We want each of your little nests to be beacons of light, little cities on the seven hills of the Greater Cincinnati Area. So pull up a chair and have a seat at the table. We are so glad you are here.
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