I'm almost 18 and I've only been to 1 dance and it was awkward. I've never danced with a girl. Heck, I don't even know how to dance. So this article totally describes me.
However, I do have a story: When I was in 7th grade I liked a girl that was way above my level and didn't wanna tell her, and my friend told me I was being a wimp. So the next day I tapped her on the shoulder and told her straight up. No middleman or note or nothing. And even though she said no (and she was nice about it), I remember the feeling afterward was like nothing else. It was like humility from rejection plus a sense of accomplishment for still having the guts to do it.
Then I heard this adult on the radio talking about how she's too afraid to tell this guy she likes him, and I'm like BRUH...I'm 12! Telling a girl you like her is way easier than people make it out to be. If she's the right girl, she won't think less of you for it (and if she does, she's not the right girl).
So guys, we need to surround ourselves with more dances and pushy friends.
Many questions that came to mind after reading this piece.
- Who teaches young men and women to dance in America? No one comes out of the womb able to partner dance without some instruction
- Are parents teaching their children to dance?
- Is cultural transmission in America today deliberate or passive?
- Who teaches young men that they should pursue marriage?
- Who teaches young women that they should be open to marriage?
I don't see the point of laying blame on young men when no one has provided them with clear cultural instructions on when and how to pursue women and ultimately marry them. No one in America offers a clear blueprint. Everything cultural is deemed to be subjective and up to the individual.
I wonder if it has something to do with texting. None of the kids has a boyfriend/ girlfriend but they will spend hours texting each other- planning their future together, saying how much they love each other and other very intimate and sexual things - but won’t dance with each other in gym class.
I’ve seen this in our Classical Christian school. Five hours of dance is required for high school Phys Ed. It never occurred to us that when male students were asked to partner up we had to explain that we meant partner up with a girl. They all partnered up with other boys!
Girls also need instruction too. Movies and TV seem to show the sassy, mean girl getting the guy and girls don’t seem to realize that’s not real.
Casino Royale? Are we discussing the OG, because I don’t think I can forget Miss Green’s face as she slid into the seat opposite Daniel Craig and said “I’m the money”
Many young men chose not to initiate because they feel most girls aren’t worth it. Whether that’s cope is another matter, but as a fairly outgoing young man I think it has a solid foundation.
I'm almost 18 and I've only been to 1 dance and it was awkward. I've never danced with a girl. Heck, I don't even know how to dance. So this article totally describes me.
However, I do have a story: When I was in 7th grade I liked a girl that was way above my level and didn't wanna tell her, and my friend told me I was being a wimp. So the next day I tapped her on the shoulder and told her straight up. No middleman or note or nothing. And even though she said no (and she was nice about it), I remember the feeling afterward was like nothing else. It was like humility from rejection plus a sense of accomplishment for still having the guts to do it.
Then I heard this adult on the radio talking about how she's too afraid to tell this guy she likes him, and I'm like BRUH...I'm 12! Telling a girl you like her is way easier than people make it out to be. If she's the right girl, she won't think less of you for it (and if she does, she's not the right girl).
So guys, we need to surround ourselves with more dances and pushy friends.
Many questions that came to mind after reading this piece.
- Who teaches young men and women to dance in America? No one comes out of the womb able to partner dance without some instruction
- Are parents teaching their children to dance?
- Is cultural transmission in America today deliberate or passive?
- Who teaches young men that they should pursue marriage?
- Who teaches young women that they should be open to marriage?
I don't see the point of laying blame on young men when no one has provided them with clear cultural instructions on when and how to pursue women and ultimately marry them. No one in America offers a clear blueprint. Everything cultural is deemed to be subjective and up to the individual.
Bingo. These days, no two singles have the same expectations about dating and marriage, so it's a wonder *anyone* gets together.
I wonder how this might be related to the decline in male testosterone levels over the last several decades.
I wonder if it has something to do with texting. None of the kids has a boyfriend/ girlfriend but they will spend hours texting each other- planning their future together, saying how much they love each other and other very intimate and sexual things - but won’t dance with each other in gym class.
I’ve seen this in our Classical Christian school. Five hours of dance is required for high school Phys Ed. It never occurred to us that when male students were asked to partner up we had to explain that we meant partner up with a girl. They all partnered up with other boys!
Girls also need instruction too. Movies and TV seem to show the sassy, mean girl getting the guy and girls don’t seem to realize that’s not real.
Casino Royale? Are we discussing the OG, because I don’t think I can forget Miss Green’s face as she slid into the seat opposite Daniel Craig and said “I’m the money”
Many young men chose not to initiate because they feel most girls aren’t worth it. Whether that’s cope is another matter, but as a fairly outgoing young man I think it has a solid foundation.